Observations on the Insurgents

Does the Dumbplumber have a presidential favorite?  Damn straight he does.  And he was picked from a mosh pit of candidates back in August.  However, despite the existence of a number of folks far more suited to be toll booth attendants, I am compelled to comment on their taking up valuable space.

John Kasich (2%):  John is easy to spot, because he yells the loudest about the least interesting subjects.  Ohio is what he yells about most, because he is now the Republican Governor of a very blue state, run by both public and private sector unions. 

However, John doesn’t talk about unions (because these unions are bankrupting our country, with their outrageous pay and under-funded benefit promises).  But he rather talks about all the jobs and businesses he has saved or created and at the expense of small businesses and blue collar workers who will be paying for the benefits of 18% of Ohio’s workforce, for the rest of their lives.

Mike Huckabee (2%):  Huckabuster is one of the most amusing candidates on the stage, because he has a very articulate and profound sense of humor.  But why is he still in the race?

 Yes, Mike has won the Iowa caucus before, before Obama, before Bengasi, before Obamacare, before the last 500,000 federal regulations, before the last $4 trillion of debt and most importantly before Trump.  Things just aren’t that funny anymore.  Voters are pissed off and a cute turn of phrase isn’t helping.

Rick Santorum (2%):  Rick has a religion problem.  No, not that he is a Bible thumper.  There’s nothing wrong with that.  But if God were to intervene, he should have done it before Bush took us to Iraq, before Hillary decided to kill Kaddafi and before Obama took office.  And unless God has about $20 trillion he doesn’t know what to do with, all the praying on the planet will not save us from ISIS or their biggest supporter, Barack Hussein Obama. 

Carly Fiorina (2%):  Carly is an incredibly intelligent woman.  She is smart, quick, organized and can spontaneously turn on a dime to address any threat.  I can see her as a Cabinet member or Agency head, but not in the Oval Office.

Jeb Bush (2%):  Pray tell, what good can you say about a candidate, who is the son and brother of two former presidents, and who has spent more money than the bottom 10 candidates combined to garner 2% of republican support.  Here’s a guy, a former Florida governor, whose entire platform consists of:  “What my Dad and Brother did, and BTW, Donald Trump is a jerk, who will not be the nominee”.

Say goodbye to over $150 million bucks Jeb!

Chris Christie (3%):  A once respected republican governor of a very Blue state.  Christie waved goodbye to his presidential hopes when he was photographed with his arm around Obama, who had just promised him billions in storm relief, that the rest of us paid for.  He has been the piñata for the Left, who is still trying to get him indicted for closing off traffic lanes on the George Washington Bridge, because Chris was in a pissing contest with some bureaucrat. 

And the frosting on the cake is that Christie worships at the altar of Bruce Springsteen, a flaming Liberal who doesn’t give a shit about Christie.

Rand Paul (5%):  Poor Rand.  He has taken over the support of 5% of the voters who once worshiped his father.  “No more Wars, Audit the Fed and Stop Spying on Americans”, is his platform.  Yeah, like that’s going to happen. 

Dr. Ben Carson (10%):  Gentle Ben is way out of his league with this crew.  He does have a compelling story of rags to riches, much to the credit of his mother, who is NOT running for office.  I literally have to turn up the volume on my TV when he speaks, which really annoys me.  I like the guy, but he would be much better as Surgeon General or Director of HHS, where his expertise lies.  I believe his motives are pure and arguments honest, which will not serve him well when dealing with the vermin in the Congress.

Marco Rubio (15%):  Marco is the Establishment fallback position, when Jeb bites the dust.  He is a gifted speaker and has the innate ability to make any subject all about him.  He is an accomplished double talker, never phased when his shady past is shoved in his face.  Never mind he was a member of the Gang of 8, who advocates for citizenship for illegal aliens (which he now disavows, out of expediency).  Marco would do well selling aluminum siding or flood insurance to beavers, but he should never be allowed to represent U.S. citizens again. 

Ted (Rafael) Cruz (23%):  Eduardo, the Ricky Ricardo of the U.S. Senate, has proven to be quite the slippery critter.  His singular ability of pissing of the entire U.S. Senate would be great if he had considered an end game.

His only goal appears to be that he wanted to be president, so he could piss of the entire world.  Yes, Ted is smart, wicked smart, and he has total recall, which is a big plus if you’re playing 21.  But being the Commander in Chief is not like playing poker.  It’s more like herding cats, with a cattle prod, where total recall won’t help, especially when he is in an argument with a back-stabbing weasel. 

Now I don’t want to cast aspersions here but Teddy also has a forgetful problem, which does not mesh well with his photographic memory. 

No, I once held Cruz in high regard, but it began to slip when he started hugging and kissing on Glenn Beck, who has a penchant for giving teddy bears to illegal aliens.  Yes, nothing quite says, “Get your ass back to Mexico” like a free soccer ball and teddy bears. 

AND NOW FOR THE BIG KAHUNA.

Donald Trump (28-41%):  It’s not that the Dumbplumber has never gone out on a limb, but if you were going to stop Trump, you might have started back in 1988, when he broadcast his intentions to Oprah Winfrey.  He was more free-wheeling then, probably between, or about to be between, wives.  He was well on his way and had already written a bestselling book, Art of the Deal.

Meanwhile politics continued, as it always has, down the wrong path.  Democrats got more liberal, Republicans got more liberal (all the while caroling that they were conservatives) and the debt and size of government got bigger and bigger and more oppressive, with no appreciable benefit to the citizens.  And most importantly common sense, reason and historical reference were pushed farther and farther away from D.C.

But as most of you saw, the notion of Conservatism, smaller government, balanced budgets and a strong military became the anthem for Republican congress-critters every 2 years, and presidents every 4 years.  But did we see any fruit from these promises?  No, no and Hell no!  But it was the last seven years that blew the head gaskets.  We doubled the debt over the past 8 years and signaled to the world that America was the go-to country for unearned benefits.

Well my political neophytes, we might as well get the inevitable off the table.  Yes, Donald Trump had four of his corporations in bankruptcy, so what!  It’s why we have bankruptcy laws and courts.  If you’re in a losing proposition, get the Hell out and cut your losses.  Our government might have thought about that when they voted to adopt useless and abusive policies and create indistinguishable agencies, then decided to allow public sector unions, who are bankrupting this country as we speak, to ride roughshod over the citizens. 

Better we should end the bloated, redundant, duplicitous quagmire of bureaucracies we have than continue these taxpayer abusing fiascos.  It’s well past time to shut them down or turn many over to the private sector—like the US Post Office, Dept. of Education, HHS, etc., etc.  None of these are benefitting anyone other than the unionized employees.

Well my friends, it is now or never.  This last candidate is your last chance to turn this around.  And how would I know this?  Hell, just look at his business model.  He not only builds things, he builds them on time and under budget.  He works with the trade and service unions every day, but on his terms.  Everyone makes money, so why can’t we, as a nation, save money?  I’m tired of every Tom, Dick and Harry Reid telling me one thing, then doing quite another.

I might note that several of the above have already shown their lack-of- credibility stripes.

And I should add that only one of these candidates have made payroll for thousands upon thousands of employees of every race, color and political persuasion that you can imagine.  It was all our current Commander-in-Chief could do to be a community organizer in Chicago, before the electorate lost their collective minds and now criticize the current frontrunner of not being able to do what Obama has never done, run the biggest business on the planet.

No, there is no measure, or metric, by which anyone will ever compare the abilities or accomplishments of Mr. Trump to the damage Obama has done to our country.

It may not be the end of the world, but the wrong vote here may introduce it.

Dumbplumber