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Saturday, November 29, 2014

Making Law

Perhaps the Dumbplumber needs to give everyone a refresher course in Constitution 101.  In 'MAKING' law the President of the United States has no more power LEGALLY than any other citizen. 

It is the President's job to ENFORCE the laws that Congress makes, and he, or any other president has signed.

Therefore, as we hopefully will soon discover, as a result of planned lawsuits, this simple fact will reveal itself during some very long and expensive court proceedings.

Meanwhile, Mr. President, I will obey the laws with the same respect as you enforce them.


Wednesday, November 26, 2014

The Secret Service Oath of Office

The Secret Service Oath of Office:

“I, do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter. So help me God."

Now before everyone gets all twitterpated, this is how I would rewrite this oath to reflect today’s reality:

“I, stand here with my left hand on the Bible and my right hand in the air, and don’t have a clue why.  I will support and defend the parts of the Constitution, my boss says I will defend and ignore the parts he doesn’t like against some of our enemies, both foreign and domestic; that I will clean my gun and collect my check, while trying my ‘damndest’ not to get hit by a bullet meant for my boss;  that I take this obligation for a boatload of money, a Cadillac healthcare plan and an opportunity to write a book, when my term is over; that I have many mental reservations, but they are so overwhelmed by the perks, I would be a idiot to not do this; that I will make every attempt to follow the law, when I can, and discharge my duties just enough to keep the checks coming.  So help me Allah.”

Of course, the president doesn’t allow his bodyguards bullets, as they might use one, at close range, to defend the REAL Oath of Office.

Let’s face it folks, the Oath is a joke and is taken by everyone from the President on down to Notary Publics.  But since there is no enforcement of the Oath, it is meaningless. 

Mr. President, I will begin obeying the laws as soon as you begin enforcing them.

The Dumbplumber

Rebuilding Ferguson

With all the hoopla, bomb throwing and car rolling, there isn’t much time left in the news cycle to highlight the real victims of Ferguson, Mo., the business owners who have been burned and demolished out of business, through no fault of their own. 

Those ambulance chasing attorney ads, the vacation spots in the Bahamas and a parade of free catheters for Medicare patients ads seem to block out any time for attention to the folks who have witnessed the total destruction of businesses they have spent years, even decades building, go up in smoke.

So where are the do-gooders when we need them.  Hell, Mark Zuckerberg could rebuild all of Ferguson out of his lunch money.  Amazon could deliver every scrap of construction material, on UPS, by tomorrow.  And Donald Trump could put it all together from the leftovers of one of his office towers in less than a week.  But what do we hear from these Putzes…..crickets!  Which is really sad because each and every one of these schmucks have the other's number on speed dial.

No sir, what it has taken the bus loads of rabble rousers, shipped in from the ghettos of nearby cities and incited by our der Leader weeks to accomplish, could all be rebuilt and back in business in a few days with the assets and resources of a few CEOs and their minions.  Of course firms like Blackwater would have to provide security, lest the local lowlifes would be perusing construction materials to return to Home Depot for cash refunds, to sustain their drug, tattoo and alcohol habits.  But hey, that cost would just be a rounding error for Blackwater.

Unfortunately, the MSM wouldn’t cover this event, like it didn’t cover the Bengazi hearings, the real reason Obama swapped high level Al Qaeda operatives for a deserter or the Machine Gun mouth of Jonathan Gruber, who spilled the proverbial truth behind Obamacare either. 

And I would be remiss if I didn't point out the denial of outrage from locals, when their rampage allows them to complain that nobody wants to rebuild in Ferguson, denying them somewhere to spend their EBT cards and ill gotten gains from drug dealing and welfare fraud.

But you can bet your last few megabytes of storage the Internet would be all over it.

Sunday, November 09, 2014

Pot Calling the Kettle

Choke on This

FEMA is asking disabled, elderly residents to repay aid given them after superstorm Sandy.  Yes, this would be the same folks from Belle Harbor Manor, who spent four miserable months being shuffled around to emergency shelters, after surge waters flooded them out of their assisted living shelter in Rockaway, New York. 

And given that they didn’t squander their few thousand dollars on hookers, gambling in Atlantic City or tattoo parlors, I say they should give the money back.  Hell, who needs food, medicine and clothing after a natural disaster, when you have FEMA taking care of you?

No sir, if you’re gonna insist on them giving back the money, well then I have another short list of scofflaws that should give back as well, and long before the aged and disabled have to.

We can start with the $300 to $400 billion a year defrauded from Medicare and Medicaid.  And yes that number would easily pay an army of indigent detectives vast rewards for the effort.  Then we might ask Hillary Clinton to pony up the $6 billion unaccounted for over the past 5 years she was at the State Dept..  Nevermind the hundreds of billions lost to foreign aid, for countries that can’t find themselves on a map.

Then we might perform a little forensic auditing on the labor unions, who cannot account for hundreds of millions spent influencing elections and paying off goons, well beyond conducting political ads, or any other legitimate exercises in elections.  And it’s well beyond time to look into the spending of over 7 years of Continuing Resolutions, that have little or no accountability whatsoever.

And I would be remiss if we didn’t go after the Green Monster that has swindled hundreds of billions more from hard working taxpayer for energy boondoggles that boggle the mind and would have been nixed by any half competent Eight grader. 

Then and only then would I even begin to test the integrity of those shut-ins who look forward to Jello and Bingo as extravagant pastimes.

Wednesday, November 05, 2014

Now What?

Well those pesky 2014 midterms are over, now what?  With all the pandering, pontificating and political maneuvering, one would think that nirvana is just around the corner.  One would think that reason, common sense and responsibility is about to set in and America can start to heal and rebuild from years of Liberal abuse and neglect. 

One would think that the new Congress would get to work passing the over 300 bills crammed in Harry Reid’s desk.  But I believe ‘One’ would be wrong. 

I will reduce my observations down to so simple a list that any ass-backwards idiot can understand it:

How long will it take the New Congress to shrink the size of government? Now I don’t mean just the flotsam and jetsam bloat of the Pink Elephant, Affordable Care Act.  I mean reducing the entire federal government by the 20% it has ballooned to since the Lawn-Jockey-in-Chief parked his patent leather dress shoes on the “Resolute” desk in the Oval Office. 

How long will it take to the New Congress to begin rolling back the tax increases?   How long will it take before Congress begins to adhere to the U.S. Constitution, that they swore to uphold when they took office?

And how long is it going to take for the New Congress to send a message to America’s loafers that the gravy train is over?  How long before the New Congress stands before the cameras and tells all of America that the age of Personal Responsibility has arrived? 

So, while all you RINO douche nozzles regale in the midterm successes, I am sitting in my comfort zone, sipping on some single malt and awaiting the above changes. 

Mind you, I will not hold my breath while I’m waiting.  I have far less confidence in John Boehner and Mitch McConnell than you do.

Saturday, November 01, 2014

Voting RINO

What Republicans Won’t Do

With all the blather running up to the November midterm elections, I thought it might be instructive to point out all the things Republicans won’t do if elected.  Oh, they talk a big game, with ending the war on women, securing the borders, stopping Ebola and cleaning up our voting fiascoes.  But what they really will do is nothing. 

Now that the assassination of Tea Party opponent’s characters are over in the primaries, the bullying of Conservatives into voting for RINOs is in full swing.  “What you gonna do, vote Democrat or just stay home and watch them win”, is now the mantra.  Yeah, like it’s going to make a difference once they’re elected.  

Take for instance, the Repeal of Obamacare.  According to many sitting Republicans Obamacare is here to stay…in one form or another.  Forget that it is nothing that was represented to us to get it passed.  Forget that it is bankrupting many hospitals, insurance companies and letting the most vulnerable twist in the wind, waiting for treatment.  It is here to STAY.  Say it with me….It is HERE TO STAY.

Okay, how about border security.  Well, funding was approved to complete some 1700 miles of border fence, some 8 years ago.  But has work progressed?  No, no and Hell no!

Well then, I guess we will look forward to ending deficit spending.  Yeah, about a soon as we stop pissing away government studies on fat Lesbians and mating gerbils in space.  Ain’t gonna happen.  Ditto with shrinking government.  Like that’s gonna happen.

I must add that it was discovered that production of ethanol wasted precious water and squandered corn crops in the name of saving the planet, while proving that you can destroy about one third of the nation’s internal combustion engines and fuel systems by burning the crap.  But has the subsidies stopped from the Republican House?……NO!  Will they stop with both Houses in the Red….No, no and Fuck NO!

The House couldn’t even stop the ban on incandescent light bulbs for Christ’s sake.

Congresswoman Marsha Blackburn promoted the ending of the ban on incandescent light bulbs, but couldn’t get that one through Committee.  Nevermind that the “squiggly” replacement bulbs are a proven hazardous waste and cannot be trusted to live up to their promises.  Forget moronic low flow toilets unable to flush mini-turds and shower heads that won’t clean off bat guano, squiggly bulbs are here to stay. 

So, if you think voting Republican is going to change the world, just remember that the new Congress won’t even stop the bass-akwards logic that supports unsustainable subsidies for the raptor killing solar and wind projects dotting our country. 

No, you go ahead and waste your time voting for these twatwaffles.  Government won‘t get smaller, citizens won‘t gain more liberty and our debt is likely to get larger.  Despite what they say to get elected, prepare yourselves to be disappointed.