Seems that Michele Obama, stretched for something new to say, has come up with the novel concept of giving tax credits to mothers that breast feed.
Hello! Or should I say, what the Hell--o? Tax credits for breast feeding!
Well then, I have an idea, I want men to get tax credits for whizzing outside. Yes, you heard it here first. If a woman gets a credit for breast feeding, a man gets one for pissing outside. And if you think about it, it makes more sense than for breast feeding.
Cutting loose in the out and about saves water, it conserves energy and lowers water bills. I mean if you save 1.6 gallons of water with every whiz, and whiz 6 or 8 times a day (depending on how many cups of “Joe” or beers you drink) well then it adds up to a (not to twist a metaphor) boatload at the end of the year. Or put another way, how much water does a woman save when she breast feeds? Waiting, waiting….. still waiting.
Let’s face it, the planet has just so many flushes in it before all hell breaks loose. But every woman on the planet could breast feed and all you would have is a bunch of guys gawking and rubber necking, on their way to the nearest tree.
And talk about stimulus, Holy Moly. If, like former Speaker Pelosi says, “unemployment and welfare stimulates the economy”, well Hell, then tax credits for whizzing members is pure gold. I mean, this is ‘Manna from Heaven‘, and not to state the obvious, the original “trickle down theory“. We’re talkin’ Unicorns, Yellow Brick Roads and Golden Showers, oh my!
There may just be no end to the cold cash that could be ‘poured’ into our economy. Get it? Poured. Ok, I’ll move on.
No folks, Michele may have inadvertently stumbled on the very thing that will take America out of the doldrums. Half naked women flashing their ‘perkys’ and guys waving their wankers for cash. What could possibly go wrong! Dumbplumber