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Monday, June 29, 2009

The Dumbplumber and Healthcare

Well Pilgrims, perhaps it’s time for the Dumbplumber to weigh in on this whole healthcare issue. Now I don’t mean the “care” part, but rather the “paying for it” part, since that is what is drawing all the fire.

In the interest of full disclosure, the Dumbplumber has NO health insurance. A onetime prescription for Lipitor ended that dream. That being said, it puts the Dumbplumber in the perfect position to recommend reforms, since he now has the privilege of paying for everyone else’s care, but not his own.

So if the Dumbplumber had a dog in this fight, these would be his edicts, to lower the cost of public funded healthcare:

A) I had it confirmed that we could save about 1/3 on our public healthcare costs if Americans would: stop smoking(I’m not for paying for the care of someone too stupid to read the label on a pack of cigarettes), drink alcohol only in moderation, eat right, exercise and cease doing illegal drugs.

B) Another big chunk could be saved by getting attorneys out of the healthcare equation. From Band Aids to Brain surgery, lawyers are a huge financial drain on healthcare. And much of it is excessive if not an abuse of the legal system. Cap punitive awards and make losing parties pay costs.

C) No more taxpayer funded abortions, except for incest and rape. Let abortion sympathizers set up organizations to subsidize the procedures. If you get pregnant, with all the free birth control available, you’re too stupid to raise a child anyway. Put the child up for adoption.

D) No more public liability for AIDS treatment, unless it was contracted by transfusion. If you chose risky sexual behavior, pay for it yourself.

And if it isn’t obvious enough, let the government straighten out Medicare and Medicaid first, then they can go to work on universal healthcare

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