Some words of wisdom for Senator Obama:
Given that you are no longer just a “novelty” but a real threat to the assumed coronation of Hillary Clinton as the Democrat nominee for 2008, we have some tips, warnings and words of wisdom concerning, not just your candidacy, but your ongoing well being. You should not take this message lightly, as the Clintons leave a trail of dead bodies of those who posed either a threat, promise or appearance of impropriety as to their future goals, ambitions or legacies.
First, you might make a public declaration that you possess NO handgun of any type, nor do you have direct access to one from any close friend or associate. And you might also declare that you have an allergy to and phobias about park benches and ropes.
Second, you will promise to never get into a car or van with strangers or friends with any ties to the Clintons.
Third, declare publicly today that you have NO knowledge of any defamatory, illegal or sexual improprieties involving either of the Clintons that could remotely be used in a Courtroom.
Fourth, always have your plane serviced and safety inspected. Never leave your plane unattended, under any circumstances.
Fifth, promise us you will never climb above the second story of any building with opening windows or balconies.
Sixth, and finally give us an oath that you will never go anywhere with bodyguards that have ever met the Clinton’s. And as an extra precaution, take no less than two bodyguards with you everywhere that have no previous connection with each other.
There, now that may give you a fifty-fifty chance of living to be 50, but past performance is no guarantee of future success. Good luck Barack. You are going to need it. The Dumbplumber